Category Archives: About Me - Page 20

Back To The Fringe

Posted by anachostic on December 8, 2017 No comments

It’s been over five years now that I ditched Opera as my browser. In that time, I’ve been using Internet Explorer and everything has been going quite well. Believe it or not, I’ve never gotten a virus or malware using IE. And I’ve also gotten it to do everything that I needed with JavaScript and custom protocol handlers.

Despite this, the writing has been on the wall, in kind of an inverse fade where the message grows bolder as time goes on. The final straw was when Flickr displayed this message:

So, I guess that’s it. IE is starting to get the same treatment I was getting when I was using Opera: You are not welcome here. So I figured the natural replacement would be MS Edge. I didn’t like Edge initially because it seemed to be a very stripped down browsing experience. But then again, it’s been a few years, certainly they’ve made improvements since then?

I launched Edge and immediately got to work writing Extensions (which weren’t supported before) to add the functions I needed. I was successful converting two of the three functions, so I was satisfied for the time being. I started using Edge as my default browser.

Within a week, I became disenchanted with Edge. The thing that kept brewing and finally boiled over was the bookmark management. Can you believe there is no way to edit a bookmark in Edge? After over two years, you still can’t edit a goddamn bookmark? And more than that, the bookmarks aren’t anywhere outside the browser where you can edit them either! The whole “modern” app design that Microsoft has adopted where everything is self-contained completely works against Edge. So, I went on the hunt again.

My options were the same as before: Firefox or Chrome. I’m not using Chrome out of the same distaste for Google that Chrome users have for Microsoft. Firefox just never seems to have their shit together. Firefox is a great backup, but I can’t see it as my daily driver. So, given those two options, I went back to Opera.

No, of course not. But I kind of did. I downloaded Vivaldi, which is made by a company of the former Opera owner. It’s the spiritual successor to Opera. You want options, you got options. Everything can be changed, and some in ridiculous ways. But the things I really needed, Vivaldi gave me. And it’s built on Chromium, so I get Chrome without being beholden to Google.

If there’s a testament to make here about going back to your home, here’s mine. I downloaded Vivaldi and started setting it up like I used to when I used Opera. Within two hours of using the browser, I started using mouse gestures like I was back on the classic Opera browser. The gestures were already built in (no plug-in needed) and worked just as I remembered them.

My previous post’s argument about having tight integration with the mobile environment turned out to be the biggest letdown, since Microsoft abandoned Windows Phone. Microsoft seems to be embracing Android, so I guess at some point in the near future, I’ll get some non-Google Android phone and put all the Microsoft apps on it. but on the desktop environment, I guess I’m going to return to being independent and use Vivaldi.

In Retaliation

Posted by anachostic on December 6, 2017 No comments

AK: “When are you ever going to blog again?”

Me: “I just posted yesterday!”

Much later…

Also Me: “When am I ever going to sleep again?”

Still Also Me: “You have to post something today. Post now, sleep later.”

Today I got to visit a couple houses of insanity, each made further insane by the current season. The inimitable Pier 1 Imports and its evil cousin Bed, Bath, and Beyond. In the former, I was searching for holiday placemats specifically. In the latter, I was searching for a secret Santa gift.

Let’s start with Pier 1. This store has a very unique atmosphere. I’ve tried to figure out what uplifting, empowering message they are trying to convey and the best I’ve come up with is: “There are many things you can buy in this world, some are cheap, some are not. Here’s as many of them as we could fit inside this building.” I’ve never been to a true “bazaar”, but because bazaar is so phonetically similar to bizarre, I envision that Pier 1 is similar to a bazaar. Shopping there makes me feel like I have ADD. It’s impossible to get through the store quickly, because there is always something somewhere attracting your attention. And at the same time, because you can’t focus on any one thing, you want to get out of there because it’s so overwhelming.

So, thank god I found some decent placements within the first two minutes of walking in. But as I was standing in line, the ADD hit me and I had a thought of a product I knew they sold that would be a nice stocking stuffer. I broke out of the line and walked the store, looking for this item. I never found it. After checking out, I found I had spent almost 20 minutes in the store. How the hell did that happen?

Later in the evening, the GF and I went to BB&B. As we were walking the parking lot to the store, the power turned off in the entire plaza. That’s not a good omen. We stood outside the store for a minute or two and determined this wasn’t just a small power blip. So we moved on to another shopping plaza and came back later. Power’s back on; we’re good to go.

The atmosphere in BB&B is slightly different than Pier 1. They are both packed to the gills with shit, but the difference between the two would be, Pier 1 is “chaotic” and BB&B is “claustrophobic”. BB&B is nicely organized into departments, BUT, there’s a whole bunch of shit that doesn’t fit into any standard department. That stuff goes in the aisles. It’s everywhere! The specific thing I am looking for is one of those aisle things, I assume, because it would be classified as a “beyond” product. I have to walk all the aisles, which is a misnomer, because there’s only one aisle that loops the store. So, I make a loop around the store and constantly dodge other people’s shopping carts. Like Pier 1, the aisles are organized utilizing using the excellent sorting algorithm, “shuffle”. There’s no rhyme or reason to anything, which means you have to look at everything.

Don’t get me wrong, I love treasure hunting. Ross, TJMaxx, Bealls Outlet, even flea markets. That’s all fun. But when I want something, I want to be able to find it quickly. And neither of these stores are made for such precision.

And as it turned out, the product I wanted at BB&B was not stocked in store. It was online-only. Which makes you wonder why retail stores are having such a hard time against online shopping. I really wonder why.

My Asshole Neighbor

Posted by anachostic on December 4, 2017 No comments

This is Grover.

Grover, a gopher tortoise, chose my property to build on. He’s dug two burrows that I know of. Grover’s name is a portmanteau of “ground rover” and has no affiliation with Sesame Street. Anyway, he’s an asshole. If he’s not hiding from you, he’s hissing at you. Let me tell his story.

The screen on my screened-in pool enclosure on my house was getting a bit shabby. The roof had a hole in it, the spline was falling out of multiple panels, and finally, a panel fell out because of the missing spline. So I made an appointment to get it all replaced.

A couple days before the company came to give me a quote, I walked around the patio. In the back was a large hole. What the fuck. Because my GF is knowledgeable in such things nature, I knew what this was. It was a gopher tortoise burrow. If this were the GF’s blog, she would insert at least five paragraphs here on the importance of gopher tortoises in nature. And I’d heard it all before, so I understood what needed done.

Gopher tortoises are a protected species. Don’t fuck with them. Knowing this, I called a wildlife trapper (not a pest removal company) and asked him if he could take care of my unnamed-as-of-yet problem. He told me that I needed to contact a trapper who was specially licensed to trap gopher tortoises, of which there were few in my state. That’s something I didn’t know yet.

I found a licensed trapper and called him up. Trapping was no big deal. It would cost probably around $300. Sure, no problem, let’s do it. But there’s other issues. You can’t just take the tortoise and drop him off in the woods. Anyone could do that, right? Gopher tortoises have a strong homing instinct. There’s a better than good chance he’ll just show up again and reclaim his burrow. Also, to rehome a gopher tortoise properly, you have to grant them enough land to claim as their own, without other competing tortoises. And they like to roam. So, what’s that mean? Finding a new home for the asshole would cost me $3000. Plus the trapping fee. Plus no guarantee he wouldn’t come back.

So, asshole got a name. He lives there now.

Back now to my total screen replacement. The crew arrives and I point out the very obvious burrow right next to the patio wall. I tell them this is a gopher tortoise burrow. It is a protected species. Don’t fuck with it. Everything went swimmingly well with the screen replacement. They called me one day and said they were all done and cleaned up. After work that day, I got home and saw that they really cleaned up. They filled in Grover’s burrow. What the fuck, indeed.

Of course, I immediately broke the opening up again, even though I’m pretty sure he could have burrowed back out on his own. That’s what they do, right? And by the next day, Grover the asshole had made his entrance even bigger than before, probably out of spite. Did I mention this illegal activity to the screening company? Yes I did.

Grover’s been there for years since. For our Hurricane Irma lockdown party, we put out a bunch of watermelon for him, which was gnawed down to the rind in short order.

He’s an asshole, but he’s part of the property now. These bastards live 40-60 years. He’s going to outlive me for sure.

The Roller Coaster Meal

Posted by anachostic on November 29, 2017 No comments

Over the weekend, the GF and I were out in Touristville and I made the decision to eat at Kobe Steakhouse. Kobe is a place we used to go frequently, and one I still manage to eat there every once in a while. It’s at a location we hadn’t been to before, like I said, right in Touristville, near the premium outlets. Don’t ask me why we chose to go to the outlets on Black Friday weekend. Some things can’t be rationalized.

So, we make our way to the restaurant through traffic that moved like sludge through a sewer pipe. I mean, it was shitty traffic. When we got inside the restaurant, it was unsurprising that there were plenty of people waiting already. The hostess says the wait is going to be 40-45 minutes. We’re only mildly hungry right then, so this will be fine for us to build up some hunger. We get the pager and sit down for an extended wait.

Five minutes into our wait, the pager goes off. Hooray for being a rockstar! Well, that’s not true. They never asked who I was, so my frequent flyer status wouldn’t have anything to do with this. Doesn’t matter, getting to eat now! We get seated at a table with another family of four. Each table seats ten, so there’s four empty seats between us.

I’ll take a moment to explain Kobe policy. You don’t get considered for seating until your entire party is present. It’s pretty obvious this family is dining with another family, so our table has a party of 8 and a party of 2. But the party of 8 is only half-there. There’s an actual business reason they won’t seat you like this, which is going to become obvious, very soon.

The server takes our drink orders. He asks about the people not there yet, and it is determined to just bring waters for them. The drinks are served and now orders are taken. The missing people can’t place their orders as they are not there. The GF and I are starting to think that we’re going to have a half-full table, which sucks for the chef.

The soup is served. The empty places get a bowl of soup each. The salad is served. The empty seats now have a soup and salad sitting in front of each of them. Soon, the chef will come out and these people haven’t even shown up to place their orders. Is this considered abandonment yet? The server consults with the family and they don’t know where their friends are, but they are sure to be here soon. I commented to the GF that our 45 minute wait was still in effect, it was just being applied after getting seated.

Then, a holiday miracle. The other family shows up. There’s a flurry of greetings and everyone takes their seats. There’s a small issue though. There’s five people. The party of eight, which was seated as a party of four is actually a party of nine. See, this is why you wait for the whole goddamn party to show up before you seat anyone.

Despite this, everyone crams the fuck in there and the server talks with each new person to get their drink and food order. Karmically enough, the issue of being short one soup and salad is never resolved. The chef finally comes out and tries to confirm everyone’s order. There’s confusion because he has two tickets, because the second party arrived so late. The chef is struggling with the orders and the number of people and I say to him, “You have 11 here.” Whether that helped or not, I have no idea.

He begins with the sauces. The table is designed for 10, and everything is planned for 10. He has 10 sauce trays. I try to help by saying I don’t want any sauce, so he pulls one tray back. Now he has 9 trays and there’s 10 people that will want sauce. This is simply not working out.

Despite this ridiculousness, things worked out really well for me and the GF. The other parties turned down a lot of the food. Extra rice, extra noodles, extra veggies – we were loaded up. Maybe it was for the best because I’m not sure they prepped for 11 at a table.

However, even though we were fed heartily, even good food can’t make up for your meal running into 2 hours. That’s just way too much. So, it was hard for us to tell if we were happy with the meal or not. The food was good, the experience was not as much.

The server brought my check, and fortunately, I had a $10 reward that was applied to my check. I sent the bill off with my credit card and the server came back to talk to me. The manager felt bad about us being crammed in on a table of 11 and took an extra $20 off the bill. That was unexpected and quite pleasant. So the bill was paid and we got the hell out of that shitshow.

The rise and fall of expectations and reality left us completely confused as to how we should be feeling, other than full and tired.

A Good Time, Spoiled By An Explosion

Posted by anachostic on November 28, 2017 No comments

During the holidays, you are supposed to be reflecting on how your year has gone, for better or worse. Then I suppose you make future plans based on that evaluation. It’s like how it is at work for me, with my annual review being in December. I don’t really have much to worry about in my professional life, and my personal life has been pretty good for a solid number of years.

The GF and I have pretty much been loners throughout our coupledom. We share a friend here or there, but this year, we are both very grateful for new friendships. Well, one is new this year, and one was budding almost a year ago. It’s really weird to actually analyze how friendships form as adults, especially when you’re not really a person, you’re a collection of you and your partner. But suffice to say, the GF and I have been very fortunate this year.

And, like so many of my posts, that’s not even what I want to talk about. I want to talk about the time where there was a lot of promise and it just blew up in our faces. Literally. This couple was neighbors with the GF, and there was a huge falling out over an incident (not this incident) that is not my story to tell and these neighbors have since moved away, blah, blah, blah.

Now, it was a fall or winter evening, a cold night, and they had invited us over for a evening around a fire pit. It’s an activity I never really understood – staring at a fire and getting smoke in your eyes – but I know people love doing it, so I’m not opposed. And so we went over and hung out with them in their driveway, with what I assume was a brand new fire pit.

The pit was metal and round and was pretty ornate. It sat on the ground and had the decorative cut outs in the upper portion of the flat-bottomed bowl. The neighbors had built up a good fire by the time we got there and some drinking was involved. It was cold enough for jackets, despite the fire. (Another thing about fire hangouts – one side of you roasts and the other freezes. Fun!)

The night wore on and nothing was terrible at all. We got along pretty well. But, without warning, the fire pit exploded. Yeah, nothing more to say. It just blew up. The thing launched probably about 5 feet in the air and it began raining fire and ash down on all of us. No big deal, really. That doesn’t happen often to me, if ever, but in this specific case, my jacket bore the brunt of the cinders, melting holes in multiple places. The GF took some cinders to the hair, which lit on fire. It was fine, we got the hair put out without any disfiguration. And after the panic subsided and some neighbors came out to find out who dropped a bomb on the area, we took note of the damage.

There is a lesson to be learned here, and that lesson is, don’t put a flat-bottomed fire pit on the ground and especially do not put it on a concrete surface, like a driveway. Elevate that fucker. I deduced what had happened pretty quickly and it was confirmed later. The fire pit, resting flat on the concrete, heated up moisture and air that was trapped inside the concrete. With nowhere for the heated pressure to escape, it eventually exploded like a cheap pressure cooker. This is actually what launched the fire pit into the air. And underneath, where the fire pit had been, was a substantial hole in the driveway.

Fortunately, we have had no explosions with our new friends and as for those old friends, it was probably prophetic as to how it would turn out in the long run.

It’s The Small-Town Vibe

Posted by anachostic on November 16, 2017 No comments

Yesterday had a couple of curious events, especially curious to happen in the same day, both involving dining.

For lunch, a bunch of coworkers and I (plus one who got left behind) had lunch at a middle-eastern grocery/restaurant. Hardly really a restaurant, more like a deli with some booths and tables. For myself, I grabbed some tabbouleh and some pita bread and a drink, paid for it and sat at a booth. Everyone else all had their food from the kitchen. I wondered how everyone paid for their food already. They didn’t. And no one seemed to understand how payment was going to work.

So each of them just went up to the kitchen window, asked for food and got it and was now seated and eating it, whereas I went to the shelves and coolers, got food, paid for it, and was now eating it. No one else had any order slips, checks, or anything else to indicate what they got. The point I am laboriously making it that this restaurant operated on the honor system. Does such a thing exist anymore? Well, it worked out well for everyone, because I do have standards for my cohorts and honesty is one of them.

But, if that story is somewhat interesting, maybe mildly interesting, this one is better.

After work, I decide to stop at my local Blimpie for dinner. You know Blimpie, there’s what, maybe a dozen of them around? I can’t seem to find one anywhere, but I do love their bread. It’s so fluffy. Anyway, that’s not what’s interesting. See, the guy who runs my Blimpie, runs/owns, I mean. Foreign as well, maybe Indian, maybe Pakistani. That’s all completely irrelevant. He’s a damn hard worker. He owns the place and is the only employee. He works open to close seven days a week. His wife owns/runs the dry cleaning location in the same plaza.

Now, I feel sorry for this guy, not only because he’s always there, but also because there’s never anyone else there. Maybe I’ll see another customer when I’m there, most often I won’t. But he always recognizes me and always forgets what cheese I want on my sandwich, so hey, I guess we’re friends.

Tonight, I get my food and as usual I’m the only one eating it there. The guy comes over to me and says, “Can you do me a favor?” He puts this paper down beside me. “I’m going to go over next door. If someone comes in, have them call this number on here and I’ll come right back.”

Yes, you probably understood that just as I did. I’m in charge of the store while he goes out. That’s quite a promotion for someone who’s not even an employee. So, since we’re friends, I say, “sure,” and off he goes, carrying a box from Amazon.

He had said he was going to be gone for just a minute, but I think it was something more like five minutes. And wouldn’t you know it, here comes a customer. As soon as the customer gets in the door, I hold up the piece of paper and say. “Well, you are the first person to come in and I have been told that he wants you to call this number and he will be right back.”

The customer is like, “Where’s he at?” And I say, “I assume he went to the dry cleaners. I think his wife runs it.” He’s just “Geez,” but he gets his phone out and calls the number on the paper I’m holding up.

“Hey.” “Yeah.” “Ok.” And the guy hangs up. Then he’s just walking around the lobby. I’m not sure if I’m supposed to make sure that anyone walking in doesn’t steal anything or not, so I ignore him for a bit, then try to engage in random talk. “It must be rough working open to close every day.”

The customer doesn’t seem fazed at all. “Oh, he and his wife run this and the dry cleaning business.” Well, then. I guess he knows what’s up. Blimpie owner comes back and he and the customer are just “Hey, how’s it going?” I guess they’re friends, too.

But the point of this is, I was trusted to watch a restaurant yesterday. Sure, I’ve run pizza shops alone, like 20 years ago. But I was an employee then. I’m a customer now! What’s up with this trust all of a sudden?

Anyway, Here’s The (Wonder)Wall

Posted by anachostic on November 15, 2017 No comments

When I went to bed last night, the word counts for my NaNoWriMo buddies were 539, 447, and 0 (granted, he’s west-coast, so I may not know). Me? All of 78 words added. Beginning week 3, Sustain week, the grind. And judging from all our performances, it’s the wall.

Speaking on my own experience, I opened up the document, looked at the outline, which ended with “Chapter 33 – Lin And Steven Negotiate”, typed “Chapter 34 – ” and stopped. I had no idea what the next chapter was going to be. No idea whose perspective it was from or any sort of plot. After a couple minutes of staring blankly, I walked away from my computer.

It’s not like I couldn’t write. I was inspired to do a blog entry that day, when I was expecting to go dry for a while. And I’m writing this blog entry now. I’m doing all of this instead of working on my novel. Recently, I commented on how writing the novel wasn’t really fun anymore. And I gave that emotion some thought and had another realization.

My NaNoWriMo profile identifies me as a “Pantser”: writing with no planning and flying by the seat of my pants. And that has worked out very well for me. I am always excited to see where my characters want to go. I only have detail in my head for one future scene and how to get there, and I have various long-range events that may or may not ever come to fruition. They all depend on how the short-term scenes play out.

However, lately, something has changed. In prior weeks, I would always be thinking about the story and what was coming up next. These last couple days, I haven’t given a single thought to the story. Yesterday, I only had my thoughts about the upcoming scenes from a few days ago. Today, I sat down and I had nothing.

So, how did I get over that? I chose to do some editing. I jumped back three chapters and read what I had written. In the process of doing that, I learned that my story isn’t actual shit, which I was increasingly convincing myself it was. I fixed some basic typos, changed some phrasing, and ended up with an additional 78 words for the day. More than that, I encouraged myself that this is a story and the story isn’t over yet. These characters still have things to do.

Today will be a long day at work, but when I get home, hopefully I will have the refreshed energy to take on another two chapters. Verbum Vomite!

Random Music

Posted by anachostic on November 11, 2017 No comments

So, Woot, I’ve said I’ve been done with you plenty of times, but still you suck me in. This time, you made me buy this thing.

And you know what, you jerks? It’s not the first one of those I’ve bought. I bought not one, but two from you last time. And this time I bought not one, but two, again! If you care, I plan on taking one to work to try and drown out the stupid noise leaking from all these cubes. My desk fan is effective, but having a range of potential sounds is also very attractive.

But that’s only a lead in to what I was going to post about. I’d been thinking about this for a while, because it’s been happening for a while. It’s kind of a recent thing, too.

One day, I was explaining this noise device, the LectroFan, to AK and I was saying, “It’s weird. Sometimes when this thing is running and I’m lying in bed, I hear…” and AK interrupts, “voices? Do you hear voices?!” No, it’s not voices. (“awww.”) It’s music. But it’s not exactly music. It’s very similar to turning an analog tuning dial on an old radio, except there’s no points of static. It’s just microseconds of what sounds like songs constantly cycling in my head. And sometimes, it kind of makes sense, like “I’ve heard that before, what is that song?” but it’s gone in a flash and replaced by another song in another moment.

The LectroFan does not use sound samples, it generates white noise. White noise is a random waveform that is constantly morphing with no predictability, as I said, random. And songs are music, full of tones that overlap and interact, and those tones are made of waveforms. Another blog I manage, Relative Waves, actually focuses on the difference in sound between albums by comparing waveforms. For example, one comparison looks like:

All sound is waveforms, and you would think there is infinite variation in waveforms as sound, but in everyday practice, you will encounter sounds that remind you of something else or trigger a memory. And you also might think that white noise is just noise, that it couldn’t be mistaken as voices or music or anything else, but in small enough bites, yes it could.

This phenomena doesn’t happen often, but it isn’t a single isolated occurrence for me, either. It’s a very curious effect, and I find myself trying to make sense out of what I’m hearing, which of course is impossible. But it also makes me wonder if there are people out there that are not as logical and analytical to study the sounds and understand how they are tricking the ear. These people may be the ones becoming obsessed with “hearing voices”. Seems like there’s more of that nowadays?

The Envelope Please

Posted by anachostic on November 9, 2017 No comments

Yesterday, I picked up a new keyboard. I found it at a thrift shop. I suppose most people would be like, why would you want a grungy old keyboard? Just go to WalMart or Best Buy and buy a new one. Well, this keyboard was $100. And your reaction is probably, what the hell keyboard costs $100. And I’d keep feeding you clues. It’s 20 years old. Is this some sort of vintage IBM mechanical clicky monstrosity? The kind that annoy everyone in the room? Nope, it’s a keyboard. An Alesis QS8.

alesis_qs8

A picture doesn’t do this thing justice, only because you have to pick it up to appreciate it. The case is solid steel. The ends? Solid oak. 55 pounds of wood and steel. 88 keys of weighted piano action. It’s a monster.

It’s not the first monster I’ve had. The predecessor to this Alesis QS8 was a General Music Equinox Pro. Another 88 key steel anchor. I have a whole story about the disposal of that anchor that will probably never get posted, but it did involve me getting very belligerent with a sales person at Guitar Center.

Although the news that I now have a second 88-key keyboard is cool, that is not what I really wanted to post about. I had a revelation tonight. I may have mentioned I am participating in NaNoWriMo for the first time this year. This is week 2 and I’ll be honest. It’s not as much fun anymore. And that led me to my revelation.

If you have ever programmed a synthesizer, you probably know about the ADSR envelope. If you have ever participated in NaNoWriMo, you are living through an ADSR envelope. If you’ve done both, you are probably nodding right now. For those that don’t know what an ADSR envelope is, I will explain it very quickly and it will make immediate sense.

This is an ADSR envelope:

adsr-1-r471x

ADSR means: Attack, Decay, Sustain, and Release. And these four points of the envelope correspond to the weeks of NaNoWriMo. You’ll need to replace “Amplitude” with “Daily Word Count”.

You have your first week, where you are full of energy and ideas, so your word count skyrockets. The second week (where I am now), your output drops to a more realistic level. Week three is the grind (I’m going to expect this will be true), where you have to force yourself to keep going although you are sick of seeing words on a screen. The final stage, if you make it, and if you’ve plodded along consistently, is coasting to the finish line, putting in filler text and additional dialog that fills in the blanks until you collapse at the finish line with one word left to go and you find that one character who never had a line of dialog and make him say, “Fuck.” Just because.

So, welcome to Decay week of NanoWriMo. Next week, we all Sustain.

Temporary Improvements

Posted by anachostic on November 3, 2017 No comments

Day one of my first NaNoWriMo. I don’t know what really to expect, so I probably overprepped. I planned on planting myself in front of the computer and not moving for hours and hours. So, to make sure I was uninterrupted, I ordered food from Pizza Hut to eat first, or during, or whatever. This post isn’t about the writing part, it’s about the food part (but not about the eating part).

I got to PH and picked up my pizza. It’s a different crew tonight and I don’t recognize anyone. Seeing as I go there weekly, more or less, we kinda know each other. Anyway, when the counter person came out with my food, she handed the pizza to me and walked off. That’s kind of rude in and of itself, but the question popped into my head that I wasn’t asked to look at the pizza first to make sure it was done correctly.

When I got to my car, I wondered more. Wasn’t that a thing for Pizza Hut? Something like, “Your pizza is free if we don’t ask you to look at it?” Now, I don’t particularly care if my pizza is free or not. I’m pretty sure I still have a credit on file with them that I’ll probably never use since I always order online. But, Pizza Hut was obviously concerned about customers seeing their pizzas at some point. It’s logical. Catch mistakes before they leave the store. The customer won’t be nearly as pissed off as they would be if they had to turn around and drive back for a replacement. So to incentivize this behavior in their employees, they established this rule, with the penalty of having a charge-off if the employees didn’t comply.

Ok, so an employee didn’t follow the protocol. But when I looked back in my memory, I didn’t see the rule promoted or displayed anywhere in the store. At least nowhere that I noticed it. How does a rule like this just end? That’s like my Quicken post where Intuit promoted better customer service free for a limited time. It’s not worth doing if you’re not going to do it all the time. (And in retrospect, how weird is it to explicitly say you have to pay for better service? It’s more like an unspoken thing.)

The same thing for DQ and their upside-down Blizzards. The Blizzard is supposed to be free if the cup isn’t flipped over when they hand it to you. But that’s not a universal rule. When I was back in PA, the DQ there had a sign stating they were not participating in the “upside-down or free” promotion. I’m unsurprised by that considering the customer base in that town, but regardless, I know the “upside-down or free” promotion will end at some point. And then what? It just goes back to the way it was. Why do it in the first place? In DQ’s case, I suppose it’s a wow-factor, albeit a lame one. Yeah, it’s thick, yippee. And if it’s always going to be thick, why not always flip it? Or why ever do it? What does giving it away for free have anything to do with anything?

When I stand back and look at it, I find it weird that a company has to reward a customer for a employee not doing a particular action. Granted, there are some examples like “if you don’t get a receipt”, which only exposes the fact that the business hires thieves. But how about, “if we don’t tell you about our drink specials” or “if we don’t ask you to order an appetizer”? Your meal will be free if we don’t annoy you?

Maybe this has contributed to the rise in online ordering and take-out orders.

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Anachostic