Happy After-V-Day. So, how did it go? Did you brave the crowds or stay home? Did you feel yourself up or were there others involved? Doesn’t matter. The day for that is past, now it’s just normal life again. Well, except for the bros out there just tapping their feet waiting for Feb 21 – Steak and Blowjob Day.
Me, I spent a lot of it in airports and in the sky and on the road. My V-Day dinner was alone at Wendy’s. Not really alone, there was a family there. I’m not sure if there were celebrating V-Day by fighting or arguing or disagreeing or just having an intense conversation. Everyone has their relationship rituals.
But, there a secret that the marketing firms don’t tell you about V-Day, and it’s not that there is such a thing as Steak and Blowjob Day. It’s that you don’t have to wait until February 14 (or 21) for you to get your candy, flowers, attention, steak, blowjob, or arguments. You can do it as often as you wish, every day even. Buy a bag of gummy bears. Every day, eat one, give a blowjob and have a fight about it.
Or you can be normal humans and just care about each other every day. Or whenever you feel like it or whenever it is required or appropriate. Do it in your own way. Some people show love with food, some with fighting, I guess? Here’s a few random ideas for you and your partner. Stupid kids who have no relationship experience like to call bullshit like this #RelationshipGoals. Don’t make it a goal, just do it as something.
First off, have a movie night. But give it an edge. Make it slightly dangerous. Go to a pawn shop. Wait, hear me out. If you haven’t been to a pawn shop before, you would be floored at the number of DVDs they have. And they want to get rid of them, badly. They are cheap as hell. It’s cheaper to buy than to rent.
And when the price is so low, there’s no emotional investment in choosing a good movie. The emotional investment should be with each other, anyway. So here’s the deal. You each choose one or two movies each and you must watch them to the end, together. You’re going to find some weird stuff at the pawn shop, for sure. If the movie sucks, have sex while it’s playing, it still counts as watching.
Maybe movie night is an all-day thing, maybe not. But here’s an idea for daytime. Do you think you’re well-grounded in reality? Do you think you’re pretty run-of-the-mill normal? Do you want to challenge those impressions of yourself? Maybe have a fierce battle with inadequacy? Well, this date idea will do it.
Go on a model home megatour at some housing developments. Maybe you’re not living in a place that has a lot of real estate booming going on. That makes it even better, drive to one and you’ll be able to resist the siren call easier. But if you haven’t been home shopping, it’s like going shopping for Maserati’s. See, because no one makes cheap homes anymore. Cheap homes are used homes, older homes. Builders can’t make money on starter homes. Even if they could, and maybe they would try, they are not going to make a model house show you what you can get for bottom dollar. That’s not how things are sold.
So tour a bunch of model homes. You’ll see excess and grandiosity and features and fixtures that will leave you shaking your head. When you get to the 4,000+ sqft house with multiple game rooms and a bathroom that could be a studio apartment in itself, you will have a new appreciation for the simple life and a fresh disdain for the metaphorical Joneses you’re supposed to keep up with. And hopefully, if your partner is of the same mindset as you, which I would hope so, you will walk away collectively stunned and grateful to have each other and that you share the same values.
Finally, and this idea is simple, generic, and simply honest. Do something together that exposes a vulnerability. You always want to show your best side to your partner. You always want to be perfect. But, it’s healthy to let your guard down occasionally. Let your partner know you really are human and can do embarrassing things, or can fail to do something correctly or well. Couples painting? Wall climbing? Ice skating? Karaoke? These are things that don’t have to wait for V-Day or Steak/BJ-Day. You can do them whenever and as often as you want. And it’s perfectly fine to suck at them, because those things are not your relationship.
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