Parental Advisory

It’s a pretty big joke to talk about the universal grammatical usage of the word "fuck". I’m not sure people have given credit to the lesser swear words and how broadly they can be used.

For example, "hell" is used for many different purposes. I’m not sure when it became responsible for as many descriptions as it currently is, but its use is extensive.

It can be used as a volume measurement, "That’s big as hell", "It was tiny as hell." It’s a quantity measurement, "I got a hell of a lot of them." You can use it for describing conditions of any kind, "It’s hot as hell", "looks like hell out there", "You look like hell."

There’s many more uses of hell, and most all can be substituted with "shit". However, "damn" has some different applications. Although damn is both verb and noun, "Damn you," "I don’t give a damn," it can’t be used in noun form like shit and hell. "It’s hot as damn" makes the speaker sound less intelligent, as ironic as that might be.

So, give pause to the proper usage of swear words and marvel that we have defined a pseudo-ruleset as to which swear words can be used in a sentence, even as society says we shouldn’t use any at all. Mmm, I love me some run-on sentences. Bitch.

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